Meet the Professor

The Ministry is truly blessed with our very own in-house, world-renowned meta-physician in the science of lies. Past indiscretions aside, his credentials remain impeccable, The Bush administration, BBC (Brown Broadcasting Corporation) and Barbara Streisand have all had the pleasure of his services.

Our first adventure saw the Professor involved in a purely covert capacity, mainly because at that time, much of his science was subject to general ridicule as well as the Official Secrets Act.

The decision to reveal his involvement, make his diploma course and knowledge available to us all was the result of the current political climate as well as “creative differences” in the marital home. We’re very grateful for his return.

Unkind souls have referred to him as a charlatan, a huckster and a self-important, delusional teutonic twat. “Teutonic” is a matter of dispute - his origins are nefarious and his accent has been known to traverse continents in the space of a single sentence. He describes himself as “fearless but generally shy and retiring - I prefer my work to do the talking”. Forced into self-imposed exile he spends his days dabbling in dark arts and dealing with “the banes of my life” - lawyers and the Mrs.

The Professor’s skills were tested to the very limit by our interviewees - especially as our purpose concerns itself with honesty, transparency and accountability.

Since the recent de-classification (and subsequent denials) of his rigorous scientific experiments/practices we are pleased to be able to reveal at least some of the details at this time :

The Professor

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“...utterly compelling”The Daily Telegraph

“I think this is so ridiculous, this whole thing”Michael Howard MP